Pictures of Gods Love

      I traveled with my family yesterday to Minot Air Force Base to visit my brother,sister-in-law and (dare I say) most importantly my little nephew for memorial day weekend. As I lay awake in  my lazy-boy/ bed for the weekend last night, I felt such an incredible overwhelming sense of how blessed I am with the family that I have. Granted, during the six-hour drive that should have been a four-hour drive I was wishing that my two little brothers didn't have to stop so often and that my parents didn't have to stop at every sign of civilization or have a sit-down dinner even when traveling, but I am blessed.

     Last night I got to tip-toe into my nephew's nursery and creep up to the crib and watch him sleep. He's gotten so big already. This morning I woke up from my lazy-boy bed to baby chatter and got to hold the love of my life (I make no secret of this to my fiance by the way haha), my nephew Titus. Every baby seems perfect to me, I love babies, but I swear my nephew has to be the most perfect of them all. He has the biggest blue eyes, the softest skin, the most delicate and perfect face, the most hysterical and precious laugh. When he held his chubby little hands up to my mouth with a piece of squished peanut butter and jelly sandwich at lunch today my heart melted and when he laughs at his own joke (gibberish chatter) I think he is the most hilarious comedian I have ever heard. You know that feeling when you think you can't love someone more? Yeah, I get that every time I see him. 

     I've been thinking about how blessed I am and how much I love my family and my precious little nephew and I am overwhelmed with how much my heavenly father loves me to have blessed me with the family that I have and give me one of the greatest treasures in being an aunt of such a precious little boy. When I look at Titus, my heart bursting with love and admiration, I can't imagine how God could love me any more than that, but he does. And he loves every other person like that. He wants me to love everyone like that. It's so simple but unfathomable and I fall so short. I mentioned in my support letter (which I shared in my first post on this blog) that God has been working in my heart to anguish for people and not be satisfied with superficial or complacent love but that I would ANGUISH for their souls, that I would love them desperately, that I would give anything for them. I don't love people like that yet, I don't love everyone like I desperately love my nephew but I want to and I know if I am faithful God will continue to grow that in my heart. 

     This summer I want to know more deeply how to anguish even more for the lost people of this world. I want to love them so much my heart hurts, I want to look in their eyes and fight for their salvation like I would fight against anything that tried to harm my nephew. Someone asked me once if you can love someone without knowing them. I know I loved my nephew before I ever met him. I would have given my life for him the moment I knew he existed and after meeting him that only grew - even though I still don't even know how that is possible, I loved him so much before. I want to love people I've never even met, and yes, it is possible. I want to love them so desperately I would give my life for them before I've even met them and when I finally do meet them, when God brings them in my path, I want that desperation and love to grow even more - though I won't know how that is possible either. I know I can't love like this without God and I couldn't even desire that kind of love without him and so I pray that God will grow in me the kind of desperate love he has for me and every other person in the world.

     As I write this, I try to hold back tears, because I know that somehow - I have no idea how - God loves me as desperately as I love that little blue-eyed boy asleep in a room nearby, and more. God has painted pictures of his love in all his creation and today I am overwhelmed with the picture he has given me. What picture of love has God put in your life today?